nature in tegna

i am small but very strong

any obstacle in the path of life is there for a reason, 

find the reason and the obstacle can be overcome.

(l.f. bottema)

silhouette in nature

walk and don't think

the flowers of the dead

we dutch people like to bring the outside inside our homes, as in having flowers standing around to give a nice touch to the living surroundings. days are getting shorter, the weather is changing and we need some warmth in our family space. it is time to bring autumn in. i have done that for ages as my mother did, by buying chrysanthemums. a nice big, really big potplant with lots of flowers and that will last until we bring in the poinsetta's for christmas. when i moved in with hubby dear, he was shocked when i went out and bought one of these monsters the month of october. "these don't come into houses, these belong on cemeteries". it is a big business chrysanthemums here in ticino, together with the red devotional candles. hubby dear had a small construction job to do in the next village last week, the week before 'all saints'. and he had to put a waste container next to the flower shop, where the outside exposition stands. the owner came out screaming. "what are you thinking, putting that container in front of my flowers. this is the only week of the year that i really have something to do!" poor lady. so he said ok i will to the job next week. yes, the day of november 1st arrived, 'all saints'. people get busy to get together graves of forgotten and not-forgotten  relatives. important that the others see that graves are kept, at least for this moment. the cemetery never looks as nice, and in order, and loved like these days. never mind if you have thought about these family members in the last year or not. that is not the point. it is all about show. on the day itself, there will be a ceremony where a clergyman will pray and spread the holy water with his toilet brush all around. this is one of these days where one is to be seen. whisper goes around about the lost souls(aka us!), who do not turn up, thus have not any respect for the dead. i do have respect for the dead. i dust my parents on a regular basis since they have been taking up space in my living room. that is not just a once in a year job, but at least once a month i have a go at them. having the chrysanthemums is the ultimate solution to for graveyard, they last for ages. can even withstand freezing temperatures. so if you are lucky, you will only have to turn up again in spring to clear out the putrefied plant and than wait for next fall to arrive.

the culinary aspects of the ticino apple pie

just put my 'chocolate dream' cheesecake in the oven. i rarely bake because my kids hardly ever eat cakes, cookies or pies. and if you look at my butt, you can imagine where the leftovers went. but i love baking. when i started living with hubbydear, i would bake every friday afternoon. every week something new. when we were last time in florida, we gotten into 'the cheesecake factory', food and pies. daniël loved the different sorts of cheesecake, so i thought today 'what the heck, i'll bake a pie'. a couple of weeks ago we had a bake sale for the footballteam. i made chocolate chip muffins and a pumpkin pie. when i went to drop of my baking goods, the only thing i saw, were apple pies and maybe a chocolate cake or two. it is incredible, the culinary capabilities of baking are reduced to apple pie here in the south of switzerland. if you ask people over for diner, they will offer to bring dessert. great! until you see what it is. you can be darn sure it's another apple pie. and it is not like the pies i know from holland, an outer crust filled to the rim with cut up pieces of apple spiced with cinnamon and some brown sugar and a top layer of dough again. i am licking my lips by the thought. the procedure here down south is very easy. slices of apple on top of a bought pastry dough, over it will be poured a mixture of egg, milk and sugar. i even talked to an old lady whoes husband was a baker here. until somewhere in the eighties, he baked pies for campsite stores. they only did fruit pies. a bottom of dough, a layer of vanilla pudding, a layer of fruit and then a topping of gelatine. what a pity, there are so many great recipies out there. back to the bake sale. when i came to pick up the remnants, the muffins where sold, but the pumpkin pie was still there. only a small piece sold. what we say in holland "what the farmer does not know, he will not stuff down his throat".

have a great weekend, and take care!

MIERENNEUKERIJ - fucking ants

MIERENNEUKERIJ is a word which is only know in the dutch language because only the dutch (mostly the goverment) can be that irritating in their ways that one would say "oh my god, what  a MIERENNEUKERIJ". it means fucking ants, which you can understand would be very difficult for a man. this time i am so upset because little boy needs a new pasport. he has been getting a new pasport every five years since he was born. when we were still able to get our pasport thru the consulat of lugano there was never a problem. i do not know if that counts and because we go to italy now where there are also numerable complications in government offices and dutch who live there got influenced by the manners of grandeur of the italian, or if the dutch laws have changed. anyway, the dutch are very good at making a simple task very complicated. so complicated that you do not understand shit. for a new pasport one needs a photo. too complicted to explain so here is the link! http://www.paspoortinformatie.nl/dsresource?objectid=5126&type=pdf.
the consulate of milan states: we need a legalized birthcertificate, not older than six months. why isn't the original good enough. as if the information on the fucking piece of paper changed since the kid was born! we need a legal piece of paper where it is written that little boy lives with big boy and mommy and daddy in the same household. should i also have mentioned the dog, three cats, two degu's and numerous illegal mite? what if i would kick out his father, or he would die? when i go to the consulate in milan for my pasport, i will ask them if they need the ashes form my parents and do some dna testing to see if i was really there child. up to now i have spent 45 euro's and that little booklet will set me back another 42,50. it makes me definity think about becoming swiss. on this matter they are very relaxed. anyway, i am looking on the official website from the dutch government now, and there is written "only if the child has never had it's own pasport, one needs to bring a legalized birthcertificate". well, it seems that in milan they do not know that! no need for a paper that states the family composition either. but i can see some hope for the future. but i hope they 'don't make me happy with a dead sparrow'. they are trying out a new service at schiphol airport so that can one can make a new one there. and some cities are also giving that possibility to abroadies. just one catch. in the hague they promised that already a year ago. but the pasport making would take six to eight weeks. hello, which abroadie would have the possibility to stay in NL for that long a period? last time i went to milan with big boy, one year ago, we had no trouble at all. we'll see what happens. maybe i am making an anthill out of a molehill;)

off to another part of CH

for little boy's 15th birthday we had chosen a destination outside of our little canton of ticino, laax. going to an inside adventure activity(freestyle academy laax by the way). i loaded my car up with all foreigners. we live in a multiculti society eventhough it is a small place. us three dutchies, my danish friend an her two boys and a cute little scotsman, redheaded and full of freckles. we had a lovely drive over the lucomagno pass. stopped on top, in the middle of fog and the three younger boys had a run around on the stony hills. an atmosphere like in the lord of the rings. anything could break loose at any moment. we drove on down to disentis entering the famous skiing region of graubünden. what a change of surroundings compared to ticino. a wide open valley, with rather hills than mountains, and hardly any forests. all of us were amazed by the beauty of the to us unknown. laax, as a village, is nothing special. not a characteristic village centre, no nothing. just a place to start from for going skiing or hiking. the boys had a great time at the academy and showed off their international heritage by choosing english as the language in which they would get the introduction of the day. my friend and i went on a hiking trip over falera. it was so beautiful. what a view. rows and rows of mountians around us. i can remember that i went to ilanz, near laax, when i just came to CH in 1993, to look for a job. and i was so impressed by the stony walls that surrounded me, i went slightly claustrofobic. what i saw then, i saw with different eyes now. compared to ticino, this is wide open space. i hope i will have chance to visit this region again.

driving 1028 km

had to drive to holland again. house not sold yet.....if you are interested let me know. house will be rented out, so i had to drive up to get things ready. get my car loaded with personal belongings to take back to ticino. it is a long drive, not something i am looking forward to. i like to get  over it as quick as possibile. 1028 km if i choose the fastest road and do not get lost. then i always hope that there will be no traffic jams or roadworks. so now, i leave at 4.30 am, that seems the best hour, workdays or weekends. people will ask me if i do not think it is a nuisance driving all that way by myself. i have had enough time to think about that. this time i had 9.55 hrs, including 1.10 hrs of gas- and pee breaks. never been this fast i think. if i drive with my boys, it would be who can be the loudest during the trip, aka arguing about anything imaginable. and that is not a fuss for me. it took me 16 yrs to get used to;) what would it be like to have along someone i would have to make polite conversation with, who would maybe like to stop and eat, or has different pee times as i do? with my sons i stop and eat driving up north, so the trip takes 1,5 hrs more. we have our favorite places along the road. when we drive back home no one wants to stop, we just keep trucking. i have considered to take a long a friend, but upto now that has not happened. no one needed to go up there. bringing along somebody would be quite an assignement for me. i am very pushed by the clock. not that i will speed, but i have my schedule from which i will not budge. get to destination asap. it is such a drag sitting there and concentrate. there will be a break every 2 hrs, my bladder can not hold out much longer. a friend of mine would like to come along one day, but she said that on a long trip like that she would also like to visit some towns. oh my lordie! to see the sights because she cannot stand sitting in a car for a very long time. well, that would make the trip at least 10 hrs longer. and that is not what i am waiting for. my conclusion is driving and having someone yapping away, is not what makes me happy. so all things considered, i am very happy to be alone. my mind goes 200 km a minute. luckily i do not tweet, because that would be a disaster. so much comes to my mind and so much happens on the road, that i could tweet continiously. and i would surely not reach my destination;) dutch friend d. said that maybe one day she and other dutch friend d. and i could drive to holland all together to share gas and whatever. nice proposition. but ladies let me get one thing straight. you two will be sitting in the back of the car, doing whatever you want to do. but as the rule goes ' to not talk to the driver while the car is in motion'!

life after kids

we still have our sons, we did not give them up for adoption or anything, but i finally was able to cut the umbilical cord. i have been saying for years, i will leave them home alone only when big boy is 18 so he will be an adult and can be responsible for his little brother. but this year i was so gung ho on going to our house in the mountains for a night, and the boys do not want to come along, and hubby dear is not happy to be there always by himself, that i started questioning my vision of how to take care of my sons. and i said to myself 'at 15 years of age, you would be home alone for two weeks in a row. get a life girl and see if they can take care of themselves a bit. you have tought them everything they need to know!'. so i left the boys alone with three friends one night, and hubby and i had a great time at the village feast of niva. and i was hooked;). since everything had worked out so well the first time, little boy had asked me if he could have another sleepover with some friends before the end of summervacation. so that was last night. ofcourse i threathened with grounding if the house would be a mess on our arrival, things would be broke, ecc. i knew there would be more than the four friends announced, but the other ones left at a reasonable hour. they did a great job at getting everything in order. last night sitting there on our porch, with a great view of mountain tops, i was thinking 'now our lives after kids starts'. if children leave the home, it must be not easy to find a balance in the relationship again. i think that hubby dear buying that old house, did one of the best things ever. instead of not knowing what to do together, we bond to create something that is ours again. we did the family, we did the  all year round house, and now we start a new life up there at 1200 meter. we work side by side, we meet new people, and we are very happy also just to sit there with a glass of wine and enjoy our surroundings. it does not mean that i will leave my two boys alone every weekend, but once in a while i will give myself the privilege to do what i enjoy very much.